Friday Film Snob Focus: Christopher Nolan

If you threw a broken stopwatch, a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure novel, a trick coin, a blindfold, and a bag of illicit shrooms into a cinematic blender, the resulting puree would be the career of British auteur Christopher Nolan.

With today's opening of Inception, the highly-anticipated sci-fi adventure film with Leonardo DiCaprio, as well as one of the few films this summer not based on any existing source material, Nolan will add his seventh feature release to his impressive resume.

Nolan's specialty is toying with perception and audience expectations. His weapons of choice are the darker regions of the human psyche and nonlinear storytelling.

Although some critics suggest Nolan overlooks character emotion in favor of his storytelling tricks, few would deny his ability to use said tricks to make films that, even if flawed, are far more interesting than most standard Hollywood offerings.

Following, Nolan's debut feature, is barely 70 minutes long, but is a taut neo-noir that hints at what's to come in his future work. A young out-of-work writer takes to following random people around London to get inspiration for a story. He quickly becomes entangled with Cobb (the name of DiCaprio's character in Inception), a robber with a fascinating perspective on his career of breaking and entering, which spirals out of control for the young man. Nolan's best trick in the film is when he reveals key information, how non-linear techniques are used to frame previous events, and how everything comes full-circle in the end.

Nolan's second feature, Memento, famously did not get any distribution deal until Newmarket responded to the vocal support of Steven Soderbergh. The film, starring Guy Pearce as a man trying to find the person responsible for the death of his wife, is structured around an affliction that prohibits Pearce from forming new memories. Memento is told mostly in reverse so that we experience life as Pearce, but as we get closer to the end, we can see the entirety of what's happened to him in the past 36 hours. The structure of the film won it near-universal accolades, and also afforded some humorous moments such as this:

Insomnia, Nolan's 2002 feature and remake of the Norwegian thriller of the same name, didn't use non-linear tricks to toy with viewers; instead, he helped viewers feel Al Pacino's growing insanity that comes with not sleeping for days on end. One particular scene, that I can't find on Youtube, shows Pacino getting lost in the lazy rotations of a table fan at a police station as he inadvertently tunes out the officers he was brought to Alaska to help. The conceit of the movie is simple, but the film slowly intensifies as several murder mysteries become helplessly intertwined. Pacino, Robin Williams, and Hilary Swank are all in top form, and the simple twists make for a satisfying departure from the typical detective film.

Nolan's fourth feature, Batman Begins, was perhaps his most conventional film to date, but he successfully rebooted the franchise with both a critical and financial success. Madness and mental illusions are touched on with the nerve gas employed by the Scarecrow and the League of Shadows. The story is mostly linear with only a few callbacks to the prologue with young Bruce falling down a well. The theme of fear is a constant throughout, and like Following, plot details that seem irrelevant at first come back full circle in the end.

The Prestige, a tale of dueling magicians based off the Christopher Priest novel, is a great metaphor for Nolan's body of work. As Michael Caine describes in the trailer, a good magic trick has three parts. First, the audience is shown something ordinary, then the ordinary thing is made fantastic, and the final part is something unbelievable. I liked The Prestige more on a recent second viewing than I did originally: like much of Nolan's work, you're able to find the clues hidden throughout when you know the entire framework.

Despite the inflated length and third-act drags, The Dark Knight was yet another critical and commercial success in the renewed Batman franchise. Although much of the film's power comes from Heath Ledger's incredible performance as the Joker, it really lands because of the way that the Joker character, Bruce Wayne, the Batman persona, and Harvey Dent are all shown to be different sides of the same insane coin. Even though Nolan is not particularly well-known for his action scenes, the opening bank heist and truck chase in The Dark Knight are two of the most memorable and striking sequences from any recent blockbuster.

Some directors distinguish their work by their visual aesthetic (Fincher or Woo), others by the subject matter they tackle (Scorcese or Lynch). Nolan is a cinematic magician whose greatest illusion is making us believe he uses a light touch. Although his films seem to emanate an appropriately restrained British poise, you can sense a sly smile throughout his work. If we were to liken him to a character in The Prestige, he's Christian Bale - perhaps he doesn't have the flair of Hugh Jackman (like a Tarantino, or heaven help us, a Shyamalan), but he presents his work with the reserved confidence that he's going to show us something we've never quite seen before.

Nolan's trademarks: non-linear storytelling, memory, madness, planted evidence, hand-held cameras, dark blues and grays, efficient exposition (such as the first ten minutes of Batman Begins), spoken quips to lighten the mood, Batman symbolism (in Following and Memento), technology, mystery, loner males, unrequited love, significant small objects, tragedy befalling females, "man versus self"

Nolan's people: Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Cillian Murphy, Mark Boone Junior, Ken Watanabe, Jeremy Theobald, brother and writer Jonathan Nolan, composer Hans Zimmer, cinematographer Wally Pfister

Some of Nolan's influences: The Shining (visible Jack Nicholson photos in Following), Blade Runner (according to interviews), Alfred Hitchcock

Watching Pixar grow up

Have you heard? Pixar is coming out with a movie this summer. It's a follow up to their modest hits, Toy Story and Toy Story 2. I've heard it's okay (100% on RT after 77 reviews on Thursday night).

It's shocking to consider that Toy Story, Pixar's first major release, hit the silver screen fifteen years ago. Not to date myself too terribly, but I was scantly out of grammar school at the time. As I've personally grown up, developing my taste in film, my outlook on the world, and approaching something resembling maturity, Pixar has done the same. All the evidence you need is in their release slate to date.

Toy Story (1995): Like all other films to follow it, Toy Story started with a simple question: "what if?" What if our toys could walk and talk, but only when we weren't looking? The themes of Toy Story are simple - jealousy and friendship, and the resolution comes down to looking at a situation beyond yourself - Woody goes after Buzz because it's the right thing to do for Andy. Make no mistake - the storytelling is sophisticated, but the morals provide more food for thought for younger viewers.

A Bug's Life (1998): Our "what if": what if bugs could talk? Again, the themes dealt with are not terribly complex, namely, Flik, our outcast inventor, has unique talents that aren't recognized by the rest of the colony. What we learn is that everyone has something to contribute, no matter how strange their contributions may seem at first. An important lesson and lofty sentiment for a youngster, but not necessarily for their parents.

Toy Story 2 (1999): What if our toys could talk some more? Friendship again is important in the sequel, but responsibility and hubris take the center stage when Woody learns he is a valuable collector's item. It's with their third film that Pixar begins to dive into more sophisticated thematic territory.

Monsters, Inc (2001): What if there really were monsters under our beds, but they were just in the midst of an energy crisis? Monsters, Inc is obviously not the first film from Pixar to have children play a role, but here, Boo is also in need of protection rather than just the companionship Andy needs. Again, responsibility is a major theme, and we can see our little CGI studio maturing in the subjects it tackles. Additionally, the way that the energy crisis is solved, by thinking outside the box and finding new, more efficient sources of energy, is even more amusingly prescient today than it was in 2001.

Finding Nemo (2003): What if fish could talk? Finding Nemo doesn't reinvent the wheel with it's "what if," but it is undoubtedly the darkest Pixar film to date with the opening death of Nemo's mother. Again, we're shown that all of us have unique talents and value no matter what society might make us think at first. With Finding Nemo, we see a combination of themes explored in Toy Story, A Bug's Life, and Monsters, Inc: responsibility, contribution, and friendship.

The Incredibles (2004) and Cars (2006): The next two installments from Pixar are not bad by any means, but after the ground gained by the previous films, seem to just go through the motions. Again, loyalty and family are explored, more compellingly in The Incredibles than Cars. This is Pixar in the creative throes of adolescence. You can tell they're on the verge of exploring new territory, but not quite ready to find their footing.

Ratatouille (2007): What if rats could talk? And cook? The thematic elements of love, unique gifts, and loyalty aren't new, but Ratatouille is the first of Pixar's films to intimately explore the lives of (mostly) normal human characters. Additionally, the fact that much of the film revolves around cooking as an art form is a decidedly sophisticated step towards maturity of story elements. Pixar is growing up.

Wall-E (2008): Pixar has a major growth spurt with the release of Wall-E. Now all-too-familiar themes of unique talents paying off and responsibility play into a love story that is wrapped in a potent social satire. Not since 2006's Idiocracy has our culture of lazy disposable consumerism been so effectively lambasted. Pixar had something to say, and the critical community noticed. There was some consensus that in a field of Best Picture nominees Slumdog Millionaire, The Reader, Milk, Frost/Nixon, and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button; Wall-E would have held its own.

Up (2009): Although some were turned off by the whimsy and accused the story of being haphazard, I think even the biggest critics of Up would be hard-pressed to deny the power and maturity of the way Up tells the initial part of its story of Carl and Ellie. I've personally seen this film close to a dozen times, and that now-infamous montage still gets me choked up. What if you tied a bunch of balloons to your house? What if you found an exotic bird in a strange land? What if your childhood hero turned out to be your enemy? These are all more progressive "what ifs" that Pixar presents us, but they pale to the central "what if" of Up that literally keeps me up at night: what if you spent your entire life without accomplishing the one thing you wanted to with the only person that mattered to you before they slipped away? Up would have been a worthy competitor for Best Picture even in a field of five, my friends.

Toy Story 3 (2010): I've purposely kept from reading reviews as I don't want to go into Toy Story 3 with any expectations beyond the simple plot I already know. Andy is grown up, and about to leave for college. While I'm not sure what the thematic elements may end up being beyond the usual, that basic premise is a beautiful metaphor to how far Pixar, as a studio, has come.

Pixar is growing up, and they know they have to put childish things aside. Making simple statements about friendship or the importance of being true to yourself simply won't cut it any more.

I'm certain that even if the themes they explore continue to mature, Pixar will never abandon the child-like playfulness for which we've always known them. Enjoy Toy Story 3 this weekend, folks. I think you won't have much of a choice.

MARMADUKE: FUN FOR YOUR FAMILY

Editor's note: I simply refused to see the big-screen adaptation of Brad Anderson's surreal and humorless comic strip Marmaduke. Instead, I hired my 9-year-old neighbor Spencer to see and review the movie for me, in exchange for ticket fare and five dollars in small change. His unedited words are below. Enjoy.

WELL I WAS EXCITED WHEN JOE TOLD ME HE'D GIVE ME SOME MONEY TO GO SEE THE NEW MARMADUKE MOVIE BECAUSE I LIKE FUNNY MOVIES AND DOGS AND I COULD TELL FROM THE POSTER THAT THIS MOVIE WOULD PUT THOSE TWO THINGS TOGETHER.

MARMADUKE IS ABOUT A BIG DOG NAMED MARMADUKE THAT CAUSES TROUBLE FOR HIS OWNER NAMED PHIL BUT THE REST OF THE FAMILY DOESN'T SEEMED BOTHERED BY MARMADUKE THATS PROBABLY BECAUSE PHIL CARES MORE ABOUT HIS JOB THAN HIS DOG AND IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE PHIL IS A MARKETER FOR A DOG FOOD COMPANY THAT GETS A NEW JOB FOR A BIGGER DOG FOOD COMPANY AND HE HAS TO MOVE HIS FAMILY TO CALIFORNIA FOR THE NEW JOB THEY USED TO LIVE IN KANSAS.

YOU CAN TELL THAT EVEN THOUGH MARMADUKE SOMETIMES IS A TROUBLE MAKER HE IS STILL A GOOD DOG BECAUSE HE TAKES THE YOUNGEST KID FOR WALKS IN THE BEGINNING SO SHE GETS EXERCISE I DON'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ELSE ABOUT THE YOUNGEST DAUGHTER BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING THE REST OF THE MOVIE.

SOME OF THE SILLY STUFF MARMADUKE DOES IS DIG LOTS OF HOLES IN THE YARD BECAUSE HE WANTS TO FIND CHINA AND RUN OUT OF THE TUB WHEN HE IS GETTING A BATHED. ALSO IN THE BEGINNING HE FARTS IN THE BED WITH PHIL AND HIS WIFE AND IT SMELLS BAD AND I LAUGHED.

SO ANYWAYS PHIL GETS HIS FAMILY READY TO MOVE FROM KANSAS TO CALIFORNIA AND HE PUTS MARMADUKE AND HIS CAT CARLOS IN A CAGE AND GIVES THEM MEATBALLS THAT MAKE THEM SLEEP IN THE PLANE AND MAKES THEM SILLY. CARLOS LOOKS AT HIS PAWS AND SAYS IT'S WEIRD. THERE WAS A MOM SITTING IN FRONT OF ME THAT LAUGHED REALLY HARD AT THAT.

THAT MOM LAUGHED AT SOME OTHER STUFF TOO THAT I DIDN'T GET, LIKE WHEN DOGS ARE SHOWING MARMADUKE THE DIFFERENT GROUPS AT THE DOG PARK AND THERE ARE THE MUSHROOM DOGS AND THEY'RE ACTING WEIRD, OR WHEN A DOG DRINKS TOO MUCH DRAIN PIPE WATER, OR WHEN A DOG IS DRINKING OUT OF THE TOILET AND OTHER DOGS ARE TELLING IT TO CHUG CHUG CHUG. THAT MOM THOUGHT ALL THOSE JOKES WERE FUNNY. SHE WAS DRINKING OUT OF A PAPER BAG WHICH I THOUGHT WAS WEIRD.

SO ANYWAYS THEY GET TO CALIFORNIA AND THERE ARE TWO SONGS ABOUT CALIFORNIA ONE FROM TUPAC AND ONE FROM THE OC SHOW MY MOM DIDN'T LET ME WATCH. THEN MARMADUKE MEETS NEW FRIENDS AT THE DOG PARK MAINLY MAZIE WHO IS A GIRL DOG AND HE DOESN'T FIT IN BECAUSE HE'S BIG. HE GETS A CRUSH ON THIS DOG JEZEBEL BUT SHE HAD A BOYFRIEND BOSCO WHO IS THE ALPHA DOG AND SURFS.

TO BE COOL, MARMADUKE ASKS CARLOS TO PRETEND TO GET BEATEN UP BY MARMADUKE AT THE DOG PARK AND CARLOS AGREES BUT GETS MAD AT MARMADUKE.

SO IN THE MEANTIME PHIL'S NEW JOB ISN'T GOING SO WELL AND HE'S NOT PAYING ATTENTION TO HIS SON WHO DOESN'T WANT TO PLAY SOCCER AND HIS OLDER DAUGHTER THAT WANTS TO MEET BOYS. PHIL NEEDS AN IDEA TO MARKET THE DOG FOOD AND MARMADUKE IS SCARED OF A BEE IN THE CAR AND STARTS BARKING SO PHIL PULLS OVER AND THINKS MARMADUKE WAS BARKING AT SURFERS AND HAS AN IDEA TO MARKET THE DOG FOOD BY HAVING A DOG SURFING CONTEST.

EVEN THOUGH BOSCO IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE BEST SURFER MARMADUKE WINS THE DOG SURFING CONTEST.

MARMADUKE GETS TO BE POPULAR AND HE FORGETS HIS FRIENDS THAT TAUGHT HIM TO PLAY DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION AND TAKES JEZEBEL ON THE DREAM DATE MAZIE TOLD MARMADUKE ABOUT AND MAZIE IS SAD. JOE SAID IT WAS IRONIC JEZEBEL WAS NAMED JEZEBEL BUT SAID I WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND WHATEVER I THINK ITS A PRETTY NAME FOR A FEMALE DOG.

THEN MARMADUKE HOLDS A PARTY AT HIS HOUSE WHEN PHIL AND THE FAMILY LEAVE FOR THE WEEKEND AND EVERYONE FINDS OUT CARLOS AND MARMADUKE ARE FRIENDS AND THEN NO-ONE LIKES MARMADUKE AGAIN.

THERE WAS A FUNNY PART AT THE PARTY WHERE A DOG WAS ON THE ROOF BY THE POOL AND YELLED OUT I AM A GOLDEN DOG BEFORE JUMPING INTO THE POOL JOE SAID THAT WAS A REFERENCE TO THE MOVIE ALMOST FAMOUS BUT MY MOM WON'T LET ME WATCH THAT BECAUSE SHE SAYS IT GLORIFIES ROCK AND ROLL AND JOURNALISM.

SO ANYWAYS THE HOUSE IS TRASHED FROM THE PARTY AND PHIL IS MAD SO HE PUTS MARMADUKE OUTSIDE IN THE RAIN AND MARMADUKE RUNS A WAY AFTER PUTTING THE SOCCER JERSEY AND DAUGHTER'S CELL PHONE ON THE TABLE FOR PHIL. MAZIE FINDS OUT MARMADUKE RAN AWAY AND GOES LOOKING FOR HIM.

SO THE NEXT DAY PHIL FINDS OUT HE'S BEEN A BAD DAD AND TAKES THE FAMILY LOOKING FOR MARMADUKE EVEN THOUGH HE HAS A BUSINESS MEETING AND MARMADUKE AND MAZIE FALL IN A BURST DRAIN PIPE AND PHIL HAS TO SAVE MARMADUKE FROM THE LA RIVER AND THE VIDEO GETS ON YOUTUBE AND IT SAVES PHIL'S JOB AND MARMADUKE LIKED MAZIE BACK AND THAT WAS THE END.

SO MARMADUKE WAS ABOUT BEING TRUE TO YOURSELF AND LISTENING TO PEOPLE BECAUSE NOBODY LIKES PHONIES. THE MOVIE ENDED GOOD TOO BECAUSE PHIL'S BOSS WONDERS IF THEY CAN MAKE A COMMERCIAL WITH TALKING DOGS BUT PHIL SAYS HE WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT WHICH IS FUNNY BECAUSE THE DOGS TALK THE WHOLE MOVIE THEN THEY WONDER WHAT IF DOGS DANCED AND THEN THE DOGS DANCE AND I THOUGHT THAT WAS COOL BECAUSE I ALWAYS WONDERED WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE IF DOGS DANCED.

THEN AT THE VERY VERY END THEY END IT WITH A LAUGH BECAUSE MARMADUKE FARTS IN BED AGAIN JOE SAYS THAT VIOLATED THE COMEDY RULE OF THREE WHICH I GUESS IS RIGHT BECAUSE I WOULD HAVE LIKED THREE FART JOKES INSTEAD OF JUST TWO OH WELL THEY CAN DO IT IN THE SEQUEL.

THERE WERE LOTS OF FAMOUS PEOPLE IN THIS MARMADUKE MOVIE OWEN WILSON WAS THE VOICE OF MARMADUKE AND HE WAS IN CARS AND GEORGE LOPEZ WAS THE VOICE OF CARLOS AND HE HAS A SHOW IN TBS BUT MY MOM WON'T LET ME WATCH CABLE AND EMMA STONE WAS THE VOICE OF MAZIE AND SHE WAS IN ZOMBIELAND BUT MY MOM WON'T LET ME WATCH THAT BECAUSE IT GLORIFIES VIOLENCE AND WOODY HARRELSON AND FERGIE WAS THE VOICE OF JEZEBEL AND SHE IS IN THE BLACK EYED PEAS BUT MY MOM WON'T LET ME LISTEN TO THEM BECAUSE THEY ARE TERRIBLE. ALSO LEE PACE AND KEIFER SUTHERLAND AND JUDY GREER AND MCLOVIN AND STEVE COOGAN AND WILLIAM H MACY AND SAM ELLIOTT.

SO ANYWAYS JOE SAID I SHOULD RATE THIS MOVIE ON A SCALE OF ONE TO FIVE SO I GUESS I WOULD RATE IT A FOUR OUT OF FIVE BECAUSE IT WAS FUN AND MADE YOU THINK BUT IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER IF THERE HAD BEEN THREE FARTS. ITS FUN FOR EVERYONE.

THERE WERE SOME KIDS IN THE BATHROOM AFTER THE MOVIE THAT SAID THEY SAW EVERYTHING COMING AND THE ONLY GOOD PART WAS GEORGE LOPEZ AND I WANTED TO SAY HEY KID IF THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK I DARE YOU TO MAKE A BETTER MOVIE BUT BY THE TIME I THOUGHT OF IT HE HAD ALREADY PEED AND WASHED HIS HANDS AND CHECKED HIS HAIR AND WALKED OUT OF THE BATHROOM OH WELL I GUESS I NOW HAVE SOMETHING SMART TO SAY NEXT TIME I HEAR SOMEONE SAY THAT.

SO ANYWAYS THAT WAS MY REVIEW OF THE MOVIE MARMADUKE AND I LIKED IT AND YOU SHOULD SEE IT IF YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AND YOUR PARENTS WILL TAKE YOU SO I HOPED YOU LIKED READING THIS REVIEW UNTIL NEXT TIME THIS IS SPENCER BYE.

Summer movie previews: action/adventure

Yes, readers, the summer movie season is already revving up, and if there's anything I like more in the summertime than grilling cholesterol-laden meats, blowing things up, and guaranteeing melanoma later in life, it's a summer blockbuster.

I have yet to read over the summer release schedule, but I'm going to go out on a limb and guess only one of the summer offerings is definitely going to be worth checking out (cough cough THE ABOVE POSTER cough cough). Let's see*.

Robin Hood

RELEASE DATE: in theaters

SYNOPSIS: Gladiator star Russell Crowe and director Ridley Scott team up to remake Gladiator, only this time he's in the woods instead of the Coliseum and armed with a bow and arrow instead a sword and slave labor.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: As much as I respect the body of work Ridley Scott has amassed over the past few decades, the trailer for Robin Hood didn't inspire a whole lot of confidence. Similarly, the mediocre critical response indicates Robin Hood suffers from the same lack of compelling storytelling that dragged Scott's Kingdom of Heaven down. Pass.

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time

RELEASE DATE: May 28th

SYNOPSIS: Jake Gyllenhaal possesses a dagger that can take whomever holds it back through time. Ben Kingsley is a bad guy. Alfred Molina once again appears in a film that is likely not worthy of his talent. I'd say the same for Sir Kingsley but he was in The Love Guru. Unforgivable.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Movies based off of videogames have a great track record, right? Even though the trailer made one of my nerdier buddies wet his pants with excitement (possibly literally), I'm thinking this will be a pass.

Splice

RELEASE DATE: June 4th

SYNOPSIS: Adrian Brody and Sarah Polley are scientists who blend their own DNA with animal specimens, creating something that looks like an alien from Alien mated with one of the precogs from Minority Report. Hilarity, apparently, does not ensue.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: I love a good horror movie, but so far the trailer hasn't sold me entirely - the concept isn't terrible but it looks like the execution could go either way. Wait for the reviews unless you're already geeked up.

The A-Team

RELEASE DATE: June 11th

SYNOPSIS: A crack squad of military elite are framed for a crime they didn't commit. It's kind of like a television show most of you are not old enough to remember. Pity.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: So long as director Jon Carnahan approaches the material with the appropriate level of chagrin, this could be a decent throw-away action flick. Liam Neeson and Bradley Cooper, along with District 9's Sharlto Copley will likely make up for cage fighter Quinton Jackson's lack of dramatic training. If the reviews are decent, might as well check it out. For the record, though, I enjoyed the helicopter snag scene from the trailer a lot more when it was in The Dark Knight.

Jonah Hex

RELEASE DATE: June 18th

SYNOPSIS: The grizzled Old West bounty hunter from DC Comics takes to the big screen.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: If I hadn't read about this in The AV Club's guide to summer movies, this would have completely passed me by. Despite Josh Brolin in the lead role, likely playing a far grittier version of Llewelyn Moss from No Country For Old Men, I'm going to hold out for critical reception on this one too. Comic book and graphic novel adaptations have a track record only slightly better than videogame adaptations or Dolph Lundgren vehicles.

Twilight: Eclipse

RELEASE DATE: June 30th

SYNOPSIS: Vampires and werewolves and shit.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: [sigh].

The Last Airbender

RELEASE DATE: July 2nd

SYNOPSIS: A young boy finds he is the key to end a world-wide war. No, his name is not Winston Churchill.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: I wouldn't hesitate to recommend a film based off of a popular martial arts cartoon to anyone that was a fan, but they key element here is one Mr. M Night Shyamalan, who has defied all logic and extended his career about three films longer than he was entitled. Be very, very wary. Anyone who thinks otherwise, I dare you to defend The Happening.

Predators

RELEASE DATE: July 9th

SYNOPSIS: A reboot/re-imagining of the original pits Adrian Brody, Lawrence Fishburne, and Danny Trejo against some nasty aliens that are scarier than Javier Bardem.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Prequels and retellings are a mixed bag. So far as pure action thrills, though, the shot of Brody getting lit up by laser sites at the end of the trailer, not to mention that Robert Rodriguez produced the film, makes me think Predators will be worth a look.

Inception

RELEASE DATE: July 16th

SYNOPSIS: Leonardo DiCaprio steals secrets from people's dreams in the latest offering from Christopher Nolan.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Even Christopher Nolan's weakest films (in my opinion, Insomnia and The Prestige) are far more entertaining than the average Hollywood offering. Inception stars Scorcese's go-to man, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ellen Page, Marion Cotillard, and Ken Watanabe, and the film promises to be a mindbender in every sense of the word. We may be looking at not only one of the best movies of the summer, but possibly one of the best of the year.

Salt

RELEASE DATE: July 23rd

SYNOPSIS: Angelina Jolie is not a spy! She may actually be a spy! But she may not be! Who cares, she has sexy black hair!

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Salt seems like a not-as-clever spin on the Bourne franchise. I suppose it could be a fun flick, though, with Jolie in a badass action role. After all, Wanted was good, right? Wait, what? Wanted kind of blew? Oh. Right.

The Expendables

RELEASE DATE: August 13th

SYNOPSIS: Every action star to grace the silver screen for the past thirty-odd years said, "fuck it, let's all make a movie together."

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Sylvester Stallone has had quite the interesting decade, especially with his continued pursuance of his Edgar Allen Poe biopic, and The Expendables continues his run of showing a) Stallone still wants to be in movies, and b) he has a sense of humor about himself. This could be ridiculous fun - personally, though, I'm going to wait for the critical consensus.

Scott Pilgrim Versus The World

RELEASE DATE: August 13th

SYNOPSIS: Michael Cera's new girlfriend has seven ex-boyfriends that apparently leaped from the screens of Street Fighter. He has to fight and defeat them even though he'd be more at home trapped in a game of Rock Band than Mortal Kombat.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Comic book adaptations are hit and miss at the box office, especially ones that aren't universally known like Batman or The X Men. I would be skeptical of Scott Pilgrim, except it's directed by Edgar Wright. Perhaps you've heard of a few little satires he directed, titled Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz? I'll check it out.

Piranha 3D

RELEASE DATE: August 28th

SYNOPSIS: Joe Dante's 1978 Jaws knockoff gets a reboot, because, dammit, 3D blue cats are fine, but wouldn't we rather see them devoured by swarms of toothy fish?

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Piranha 3D will likely be this year's Snakes on a Plane. I hope it proves me wrong and actually delivers on the b-horror movie thrills like last year's superbly entertaining Drag Me To Hell.

THESE MOVIES WILL ALL BE THE EXACT FUCKING SAME

TITLES: The Bounty Hunter, Killers, Knight and Day

RELEASE DATES: March 19th, June 4th, June 25th

SYNOPSIS: He's a charming killer! She's kind of awkward! Will love triumph?

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Did you see Mr. and Mrs. Smith? No need to see it three more times with Gerard Butler, Ashton Kutcher, Tom Cruise, and Jennifer Aniston, Katherine Heigl, and Cameron Diaz, right? That's what I thought.

Coming soon: family flicks that I would be inevitably dragged to this summer if I had children. I have a feeling fatherhood and film snobbery will not make the best bedfellows when fatherhood comes to pass.

*Okay, two: I'll definitely see Scott Pilgrim too.

Summer movie previews: comedies

The summer movie season is officially upon us, folks. It's been a dry couple of months at the cinema, but thankfully we'll be able to avoid the increasingly nice weather by escaping into the theaters for some decent entertainment.

Since I love a good comedy, and despise a bad one, let's take a look at some titles to check out and others to avoid this summer.

MacGruber

RELEASE DATE: May 21st

SYNOPSIS: Will Forte brings his SNL character, a hapless handyman/adventurer, to the big screen. The always-funny Kristen Wiig costars with Ryan Phillippe and Val Kilmer. Jorma Taccone, best known as the copy-flipping member of The Lonley Island, directs.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Hollywood adaptations of SNL skits do not have a great track record, so when I first heard of MacGruber I was skeptical. However, early reviews from SXSW and on RT and Metacritic, combined with several funny trailers, suggest that getting MacGruber out of those perpetually-locked control rooms makes for some good action-comedy. I'm a sucker for Kristen Wiig and can't help but giggle at Forte's boyish naiveté, so I'm hoping MacGruber delivers laughs as big as this sequence of skits wherein MacGruber tries to come to terms with his unapologetic racism.

Sex and the City 2

RELEASE DATE: May 28th

SYNOPSIS: Everyone's favorite alcohol-swilling, shoe-buying, sex-having ladies since Desperate Housewives and Cougartown return for more alcohol, shoes, and sex, this time in Abu Dhabi, which is looking to ban the film from playing within its borders, and wouldn't even allow it to be filmed there - it was shot in Morocco.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: As you may have guessed from my incorrect timeline of television airings, I'm not a huge Sex and the City guy. If you were into the series, the first film, or have a promising date with someone that is, I guess check it out. I'll probably stay home and watch Swingers instead.

Get Him to the Greek

RELEASE DATE: June 4th

SYNOPSIS: Aldous Snow, the lothario Russell Brand portrayed in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, is hired for a 10 year anniversary show in the Greek Theater in LA. Jonah Hill is dispatched to pick him up and get him there. It's not easy.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Look no further than the un-embeddable red-band trailer for proof that this could be one of the best comedies of the year. Definitely worth checking out.

Cyrus

RELEASE DATE: June 18th

SYNOPSIS: John C. Reilly's life is falling apart when ex-wife Catherine Keener gets engaged to Matt Walsh, but he meets single-mother Marissa Tomei and everything seems to be going his way. Except Tomei's son, Jonah Hill (remember him?) is not on board with the new relationship.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: It's a solid cast of funny actors, and so long as Cyrus doesn't get as shapeless as other Official Sundance Selections have been, it could be a potent dark comedy in the vein of last year's bleak but funny World's Greatest Dad.

Grown Ups

RELEASE DATE: June 25th

SYNOPSIS: Old dudes Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider, Kevin James, Chris Rock, and David Spade reunite the old high school basketball team for a weekend of high-jinks and fat guy jokes.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: There are some very funny grown ups in the cast of this flick. I'd like to think Kevin James is capable of more than 'big dude fall down', but I'm going to go out on a limb and say this isn't the picture to prove it. Also, the voice over guy that does the voice over for the trailer seems to be the guy that does the voice overs for trailers of shitty movies. Pass.

Dinner for Schmucks

RELEASE DATE: July 23rd

SYNOPSIS: Paul Rudd plays the straight man to Steve Carell's goofball. In order to impress the company brass and secure a promotion, Rudd needs to bring a bizarre guest to a dinner for schmucks. Will he instead find true friendship? Something tells me... maybe.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Sure, the premise is lacking in originality, but a cast that includes Rudd, Carell, and Zach Galifianakis is promising. Helmer Jay Roach (Meet the Parents) has a good track record too. I hope this turns out like Role Models instead of like I Love You, Man. I'll check it out, but you should wait for the reviews if you're not a fan of either the leading men.

The Other Guys

RELEASE DATE: August 6th

SYNOPSIS: Adam McKay and Will Ferrell team up once again, this time to turn the buddy-cop genre on its head. Mark Wahlberg costars, along with Michael Keaton and Steve Coogan.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: Adam McKay's pictures are hit and miss for me. While no picture could quite do to the genre what Hot Fuzz accomplished, the trailer for The Other Guys looks promising enough. Might as well mark your calendars.

The Switch

RELEASE DATE: August 20th

SYNOPSIS: Jason Bateman and Jennifer Aniston are a Harry and Sally, and through a mix up, Bateman accidentally artificially inseminates her. Seven years later, she starts to put it together.

IHYFM RECOMMENDATION: The trailer reads like a sappier version of Knocked Up with a splash of About a Boy. Probably a pass unless the reviews are rock-solid, which, sadly for Bateman, I'm guessing they won't be.

Is there essential summer comedy viewing I left out? Mention it in the comments.

Unless, of course, it's Marmaduke, in which case, just check this out.

An arbitrary achievement!

As I planned this week's articles (summer movie previews and a quick rundown of stuff I've seen recently), I noticed that with the previous musing on the imminent Battleship disaster, I Hate Your Favorite Movie passed the benchmark of fifty total posts.

I've had a lot of fun these past months, from the inaugural too-lukewarm review of Inglourious Basterds, to the deconstruction of the already-forgotten megahit 2012. I thoroughly enjoyed one half of the Seth Rogen movies I saw in 2009. Some lousy movies made millions, and some great ones were hardly seen. I'm happy a friend found a reflection on Groundhog Day surprisingly poignant, and another one is amused to no end at how much I hate Avatar. We've looked at movies that deliver a visceral message artfully, and movies that artfully avoid saying anything.

You'll see a few changes to the site. I added a blogroll featuring major sites I follow for film news and critiques, as well as some verbal playgrounds of sharp associates of mine. I urge you to bookmark The Junior Varsity, which has been growing steadily and amassing quite the team of pop culture critics, and where I've been honored to have my work syndicated. If you read something you like, feel free to share it with your social networks with the AddThis bar I'll be encoding at the end of all future posts. Think I'm too verbose? Follow me on Twitter (@ihateyourfavmov) for snarkisms and mini-reviews in 140 characters or less.

Throughout this creative undertaking, my passion for film, and its ability to let me reflect on my own life and the world around me, has only grown. I can't say where the next fifty posts will lead, but I'd be honored if you take the journey with me.

Hollywood Is Out Of Ideas: "Battleship"

I'm sure, if you're as big a fan of movie-pictures as I am, you heard the shocking news that the beloved board game "Battleship" was optioned for the silver screen by Universal.

If you had not heard this news, I encourage you to collect your jaw from the floor and to lie down and raise your legs to avoid suffering a stroke.

"How could this be?" you may ask. The easy answer is that with the name recognition, no matter how awful this film turns out to be, Universal will easily break the $100 million mark in the domestic box office. People will see it because it's something familiar.

Anyone up for a trip to Coupon: The Movie this weekend?

Battleship will be directed by helmer (get it?) Peter Berg, whose credits include Hancock and the superb Friday Night Lights. Although it's already announced that the film adaptation will take self-serious action route, knowing the inner workings of Hollywood as I do, I'm sure there were a few options on the table. Universal, for the record, probably would have been best off leaving all of them there.

ADAPTATION 1

FORMULA: Action-thriller

SYNOPSIS: In these modern times with piracy a rampage on the high seas, a US destroyer is tasked with transporting an elite team of SEALs to turbulent waters so they can unleash hell. When the SEAL team embarks on a mission, though, the destroyer is captured by pirates, and the US Navy is dragged into a deadly game of cat-and-mouse. With nuclear weapons.

WHAT IT'S LIKE: Under Siege.

WHY IT WOULD FAIL: Familiar formula, accidentally racist undertones with Somali pirates, and a woefully miscast Jeffrey Tambor as a high admiral that's too funny to be taken seriously.

ADAPTATION 2

FORMULA: Family adventure/comedy

SYNOPSIS: A naval officer gets more than he bargained for when his ignored but computer-savvy son accidentally hacks into a new computer system that gives him control of the entire US naval fleet. Hilarity ensues!

WHAT IT'S LIKE: A weird combination of The Goonies, The Sandlot, and Kramer Versus Kramer.

WHY IT WOULD FAIL: Two words: Robin. Williams.

ADAPTATION 3

FORMULA: Period drama/adventure

SYNOPSIS: At the height of WWII, an inexperienced lieutenant is forced to take command of an aircraft carrier in the midst of a pivotal battle when all the other commanding officers are killed by a kamikaze pilot.

WHAT IT'S LIKE: Tries to be Band of Brothers, ends up being Pearl Harbor.

WHY IT WOULD FAIL: Over-reliance on CGI and Tobey Maguire's ability to make ridiculous dialogue sound non-ridiculous.

If Battleship's 2012 release date falls on the same weekend as the new Batman pic, we are all going to have some very, very difficult decisions to make.

Specifically, do we see the new Batman in IMAX or not. I vote for IMAX.

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